Monday, 20 December 2010

Golfers Will Understand... !


Your practice swing is always better than the one you use to hit the ball.

The less skilled the player, the more likely they are to share their ideas about the golf swing.

No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.

Everyone replaces their divot after a perfect approach shot.

A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponent’s luck.

The moment that you think you’ve cracked the game, it sneaks up and mugs you.

The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the centre of a very large tree.

You can hit a two acre fairway 10% of the time and a two inch branch 90% of the time.

If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age.

If you play golf as a form of relaxation, how do you ever manage to work?

Since bad shots come in groups of three, a fourth bad shot is actually the beginning of the next group of three.

Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two double bogeys to restore the fundamental equilibrium of the universe.

Golf can be described as a lot of walking broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

To calculate the speed of a player's downswing, multiply the speed of his back-swing by his handicap.

There are two things you can learn by stopping your back-swing at the top and checking the position of your hands: how many hands you have, and which one is wearing the glove.

Golf’s law of physics: hazards attract, fairways repel.

If there is a ball on the apron and another in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker. If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint.

A good shot on the 18th hole has stopped many a golfer from giving up the game.

Golf balls are like eggs: they are white, they are sold in dozens and you need to buy fresh ones each week.

It's amazing how some golfers who never help out around the house will replace their divots, repair their ball marks, and rake their footsteps in bunkers.

If your opponent has trouble remembering whether they shot a six or a seven, they probably shot an eight.

Always remember that both good and bad luck are integral parts of the game of golf.

Wishing all readers a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, during which all your balls lie in green pastures and not in still waters!

Barry Rhodes

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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Barry
I have searched through your website mailings dec 26/10 and Jan 2/11 etc, regarding the definitions of OB and LWH and I am confused?. In a LWH "the margin of the hazard is defined by the nearest OUTSIDE points of the stakes. Is this referring the water side or the course side. With OB stakes the rules refer to " the nearest INSIDE points of the stakes. This I know is the course side. With lines, you are OB if your ball is COMPLETELY on the OB side not touching the line. With LWH the ball is in the LWH if it touches the line. thanks

Barry Rhodes said...

Anonymous,

You can find the Definitions at the front of the Rules book, or access them on-line at http://www.usga.org/Rule-Books/Rules-of-Golf/Definitions/.

You are correct with your understanding of the margins of (lateral) water hazards and out of bounds. There does appear to be a contradiction but I always remember it like this;

When any part of a ball touches:-
a putting green, it is on the putting green
the teeing ground, it is in the teeing ground
a bunker, it is in the bunker
a water hazard, it is in the water hazard
casual water, it is in casual water
an abnormal ground condition, it is in the abnormal ground condition
the course, it is in bounds (i.e. not out of bounds

(See my blog of 12th November 2009)

Barry