Thursday, 22 December 2011

Golfers Will Understand (2)

At this same time last year I blogged on some ‘truisms’ about casual golf. Here are 20 more;

Brand new golf balls are water-magnetic and, while this cannot be measured scientifically, the more expensive the ball, the greater this water-magnetism.

If you want to hit a 7-iron as far as a scratch golfer, simply try to lay up with one just short of a water hazard.

When your next shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls.

If your driver is hot, your putter is ice cold; if you can hit your irons, you will top your woods; if you keep your right elbow tucked in, your head will come up.

The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all of your many other errors.

It's not a 'gimme' if you're still away.

There are two kinds of bounces; unfair bounces and bounces just the way you meant to play it.

Don't buy a putter until you've had a chance to throw it.

When you look up, causing an awful shot, you will always look down again at exactly the moment when you ought to start watching the ball if you ever want to see it again.

Never try to keep more than 10 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing.

You can put a draw on the ball, you can put a fade on the ball, but no casual golfer can put a straight on the ball.

A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.

A good golf partner is one who's always slightly worse than you are. If you get a lot of invites to play, now you know why.

If there's a storm rolling in, you'll be having the game of your life.

If you're afraid a full shot might reach the green while the foursome ahead of you is still putting out, you have two options: you can immediately shank a lay-up or you can wait until the green is clear and top a ball halfway there.

Golf balls from the same sleeve tend to follow one another, particularly out of bounds or into water.

It’s far easier to get up at 6.00am to play golf than at 10.00am to mow the grass.

The frequency with which balls are lost increases as the available supply decreases.

The secret of good golf is: use your real swing to take the big divot, use your practice swing to make the shot, and always hit your ‘do-over’ first.

Your best round of golf will be immediately followed by your worst round. The probability of the latter increases with the number of people you tell about the former.

Wishing all my readers a Very Merry Christmas,
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